Freedom

 

I finished painting the above picture this past summer.  It is the 7th attempt at painting a vision God gave me during a prayer session in 2006.  I wanted to share it because it represents freedom to me and it gives me hope for more healing and being in His presence.

The original vision had a horrible black demon in the left lower corner, however, Jesus was holding the demon back.  I love how that developed or changed because it is nothing but a mere orangish fire-like corner now.  And, well, the rest of it didn't change much from the original.  Still a vision of running in a field...freedom.

I started this blog in June of '09 when I had some friends encourage me to.  They told me that I had sent them some great emails that really blessed and encouraged them so, they thought I should write similar things in a blog to encourage others.  I also thought a blog site would be a great place to share some of my poems.  So, a lot of my earlier posts show these types of things.

However, during the past couple of years, I ended up being exposed to spiritual abuse.  So, some of my posts were expressing anger about that. But, I can now move forward with a great discern-o-meter for recognizing spiritual abuse. 

So, it is my hope that God will allow me to begin again with heart-felt and encouraging posts.  While the spiritual abuse ones have ministered to others, I believe I need to find a balance.  A balance that will not only educate on spiritual abuse but will also encourage.

I pray we all would encourage one another.  I pray we all would seek His presence and live in His freedom!

His instrument, His song

[This post is part of a group synchroblog. This month the bloggers will share stories related to Creativity & Christianity. Check out the awesome blogger's links below!  I will add to the list as they come in!]

I have had quite a few art forms impact me in the last 5 years.  However, recently, I have been really amazed and blessed through music.  Mainly because I have been able to work with an amazing keyboard and vocal coach.  A coach that is able to "see art" and potential in me and help bring that to the surface and, a coach that is able bring life lessons into each session.
Initially when I started playing my keyboards I was really nervous.  I hammered away at arpeggios and scales with hesitant starts and stops, no rhythm and varied volume.  I tended to be too hard on the keys and always getting ahead of the recommended time signature.  Unfortunately, not too uncommon as to how I can live my life.  I tend to be a little too hard on myself (friend's feedback), hesitate because of fear and try to get ahead of God's time signature.

The good news, my keyboard playing has become more fluent and more in time with the beat!  Why?  Well, it's because of one thing...practice.  A word that I believe He is encouraging me to learn in life too.  Practicing giving and receiving grace.  Practice "pressing in" and taking risks.  Practice waiting on God, letting go and allowing His timing to unfold.

More recently in one of my vocal lessons, my coach was working with me on placement of my voice in my head(or outside of it) to produce the desired sound with the correct volume and the most efficiency of my breath.  She proceeded to tell me a story about one of her more advanced students.  She told me that he had an amazing session in which he hit everything perfectly and then realized exactly JUST how powerful it was.  It was a time that musicians experience that really keeps them hooked...and, where it often becomes VERY spiritual in nature.  It was a time of 100% complete surrender and, as my vocal coach put it, a surrender in allowing God to "play the instrument exactly how it was intended to be played"...God's spirit singing through this student and producing His sound...perfect.

So, while practice does help, I believe surrender has to play a part.  Surrendering our lives and allowing Him to sing His song in us, over us and through us!  That piece I'm still learning too.  Practice and surrender.  Two very tough lessons.  Two that I pray become part of my keyboard playing, singing...and, part of my life.  Practice can seemingly keep us heading in a direction towards perfection, improvement and growth.  But surrender, I believe can balance that out.  A balance and a knowledge of the fact that we can only improve if it is Christ living in and through us, making even our "mistakes" look beautiful...washing away our sins!  Allowing us to grow without being too hard on ourselves!

"Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.
Art is knowing which ones to keep." - Scott Adams

I just believe that if I can continue to remember these things and apply them to life, I will be able to be His instrument, His song.  And, to be His instrument exactly as it was intended to be played.  A total surrender to Him, allowing whatever art form to be released!  Allowing Him to live, play, paint, speak, write, act, sculpt and sing through me!  I also believe this will allow me to see the real beauty and art in myself...and, in others.



Links to Synchrobloggers below:

Bethany Stedman - How God Creates

EmmaNadine - Creativity and Christianity

Bill Sahlman - Created, Continued Creativity

Heidi Renee - Synchroblog Creativity and Christianity

Annie Bullock - Old Things are New

John O'Keefe - What is Half of 11

Tim Nichols - Artist-Priests in God's Poetic World

Maurice Broaddus - The Artist & the Church

Ellen Haroutunian - Creativity & Christianity: It Matters

Kathy Escobar - open.
Steve Hayes - Creativity and Worship
Marta's Mathoms - Mythos and Create-ivity as a Spiritual Act
Peter Walker - Creativity & Christianity
Jeremy Meyers - Creativity: The First Christian Act
Steve Dehner - The Divine Projectionist
William Lecorchick - Heaven and Hell
Jacob Boehlman - God's Magicians
Liz Dyer - Divine Seeing
Minnowspeaks - DNA
Christine Sine - God Created the World by Imagination

Knit II

Hey my fellow brothers and sisters! I know, I know…you all are maybe sick of my knitting fixation…BUT, God is teaching me so much through this that I want to share His blessings!

I recently started a new knitting project. And, with good timing, I received the book, “Knitting for dummies”! While it is a good teaching book for the task itself…some of the words really made me think about this life God has given us and how He has knitted us all together as one body to display His perfect design!

As you all read, my last lesson(blog) took me through Psalm 139 and seeing the way He has knitted us together individually! But, recently, I read Col. 2:2-3 and Col. 2:19 and God reveled the many ways He has knitted us all together as one body:

Briefly, Col. 2:2-3 the ESV and NIV translations:
“knit together in love” and “united in love”
BUT, expanding The Message paraphrase REALLY hit my heart:
“WOVEN INTO A TAPESTRY OF LOVE”!

Wow, what an amazing God! I picture all of us joined in prayer together, carrying one another’s burdens and loving on one another! Then, I imagine God just looks down and smiles on us because He sees that this “joining together” is beautiful…it creates a perfect design and He loves it…loves US!

Then, Col. 2:19…
ESV: “nourished and knit together”, NIV: “supported and held together”!
And, well, again my favorite…The Message:
“Christ, who puts us together in one piece, whose very breath and blood flow through us”

Again, I love how God brings us together! And well, it is LOVE that brings us together! And, if you’ve read one of my past blogs on love( http://blessingthebeloved.blogspot.com/2009/07/humility-sacrifice-love.html ) well, you know my thoughts on love. And, it’s not always love as maybe the WORLD thinks of love. Sometimes it’s messy and painful…but, it always seems to teach us something and lead us back to HIM! It IS sacrifice...sacrifice of our souls for one another…just as Christ did on the Cross!

So, my family LOVED me well this week! Lots of prayers for my heart that have driven me back into my OVERCOMING phase!!! As you all read in my last poem…I truly HAVE seen His hand work in my life as an overcomer!
As many of you know, God has given me the courage to get beyond the trials this year and set some goals in getting back to what I used to do! I made a great list of things and was able to accomplish most of them! Just a FEW:
1. Back on the skis!
2. Hiked above 14000’…first time in four years!
3. Returned to church and prayer team!
4. Return to my career as a manual therapist!
5. Cycled over 65 miles…again, first time in four years! AND, the JOY as my fellow cyclists remember my famous, “It’s Shammy Time!” shout before a ride!
6. Returned to running!

The list goes on! Just a few praises! I did hit a slump lately with some pain issues, but yet, He still sustains me and I just keep moving forward! I know He has us all intertwined and knit together for a reason…it’s just sometimes hard to see that reason in the midst of painful realizations! But, it IS pain and suffering that we are blessed to share in with Christ! His suffering redeemed us all! His blood shed on the Cross for US!!! I imagine it is HIS blood that flows through all of us…knitting us together in love!

I am blown away by how He is working all things for good! As I just told a few good friends…I have never been SO close to the “threshold of hope” in my entire life!!! I love community and the importance of sharing in these things and being able to pray for one another...we truly are knit together for His good purposes!

Okay, thank you, my community for reading yet another KNIT blog! I’m thinking this next project or garment I’m knitting is going to be the best! I am getting better you know…despite all of my short-comings, I am His Beloved and well, He loves where I’m at and SO LOVES my potential! After all, He knit me together…knitted US together! Praise God we are ONE as His Beloved!

Knit Together

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,
I know that full well. -Psalm 139:13-14

I recently was overwhelmed with awe for my Savior as I read Psalm 139 and meditated on the thought of Him knitting me together!  The thought of a Divine hand weaving my soul together with a unique pattern and design.  And, I wonder why I can doubt so much and why I can go into so much self-contempt!?  What happens to us as we leave the womb and enter the world?  A fallen world that bombards us with lies every day.  So, as I am working on my own knitting project, I pray.  I pray that God would show me His pattern for my life and set me on a course of TRULY knowing He took great care in designing me!

It's amazing to think about the Creator of the universe sitting down to knit me together!  I think about my knitting projects and the excitement in choosing the thread, the pattern, the weave, the design, etc.  Did God Himself get excited about going and choosing the thread for my life?  Wow!  That's hard to believe, but as much as He loves us, I bet He did!  Every aspect of the creation(us) exciting a designer that was SO pleased and happy with His design!  The God of the universe sitting down to knit!!!  I imagine Him being so patient as He brings about the perfect color, pattern, design and order that gives the final project it's beauty!

In the past, it has been so easy for me to be amazed by God's creation of land and nature because I've been so attracted to the outdoors!  I love being in His mountains and seeing His overwhelming Majesty!  The beautiful lakes, streams and wild flowers that line the mountains and the sight of a hawk soaring above a meadow that completes His perfect canvas!  In the mountains I can truly SEE His handiwork and KNOW He is an artist!

So, to think about God as an artist in creating me?  Wow!  I have to admit, not something that I have pondered and grasped as much as I have lately.  I believe I've been able to SEE others, but in the sense of seeing their hearts and the GOOD in them!  So, looking at others as God's art is amazing to think about!  I wonder if that is some of what the band Jars of Clay were thinking when they wrote the song, "Art in me"?  Here are some of the lyrics:
In your picture book I'm trying hard to see
Turning endless pages of this tragedy
Sculpting every move you compose a symphony
You plead to everyone, "see the art in me"

So, can I see the art in me?  In others?  Can we see the art in each other?  I sure hope so!  And, I hope we can learn to see it better and better as we encounter one another in community!  For I also believe God has intertwined our lives together by His Spirit.  We ARE one!  Designed to be one in Him!  What a beautiful thing to think about!

Right now, I think God might even be repairing and carefully picking up some "dropped stitches" of my life!  I know when I drop stitches in my own knitting projects, I often go running to friends who can help me fix it.  Sometimes, yes, I am able to fix the error myself, but I am so happy to have friends who can help me when I can't.

So, as I have pondered these things about knitting and God as a knitter...well, I pray we all would see the beautiful design that He has created in ourselves and in others.  I pray we would allow God through our community to pick up dropped stitches and truly SEE each other as His perfect creation!  SEE it Beloved, His creative expression is in all of us!